I have a vision. A Eurovision...

Tonight something magical happens.
All of Europe joins together to participate in the Eurovision Song Contest.

Prior to last year I wasn't really familiar with this glorious event.  I had heard of it, however, thanks to an episode of Father Ted where the priests enter the contest on behalf of their tiny island.  Their entry was awesome:

My Lovely Horse 

(I do my best to pick videos that you will be able to watch whether you're in the US, UK or elsewhere. 

I apologize if there are any here you can't watch.)

I assumed that this entry was outlandish and exaggerated for comic effect.  Oh, if only I had known.  "My Lovely Horse" fits right in with some of the songs that compete for the honour of winning.  It's sort of like Miss America, but instead of pretty ladies smiling in beaded gowns to represent their states, it's "interesting" acts performing songs to represent their countries.
Last year one of my particular favourites was the entry from Armenia- a song entitled "Apricot Stone".  (I can't even remember anymore- do Americans know that a stone is a pit?)  It was about an apricot stone.  It was performed by a woman who danced around a- you guessed it- giant apricot stone.

Apricot Stone

There are outrageous fashions and crazy performances.  Especially from the smaller countries.  It's good fun and an excellent opportunity to make fun of stuff with Ross.

The winning country hosts the next year's competition, so this year they'll be broadcasting from Düsseldorf, Germany.  Their winning entry, sung by a girl named Lena, last year was catchy and fun (and only slightly annoying).

Last year's winner

The UK doesn't do well historically.  At least not in recent years.  They don't seem to take it nearly as seriously as some of the other countries.  This year they're hoping to change their luck with an entry that's been getting plenty of radio airtime, sung by the "man group" (they're too old to be a boy band anymore) Blue.

They can!

Also competing this year is (are?) Jedward.  If you are unfamiliar with this cultural phenomenon- you can consider your life unfulfilled.  But very, very lucky.  Because now you know about them (it?).  They have some how managed to extend their 15 minutes of fame to a staggering length.  They are fairly irritating and mildly interesting in a car wreck sort of way.  Jedward will be representing Ireland and are considered the act with the second best chance of winning.

This video is like 9 minutes long and kind of crappy quality, 

but it's the best representation of Jedward that I could find on You Tube.  

If you make it all the way through 

you win a million Ameringlish points for your tolerance for inanity.  

Here are a few choice UK entries for your entertainment:

Scooch- One of the wackiest British entries

Jemini- Received "null points" in 2003

Bucks Fizz- Perhaps the most famous UK entry.

They actually won.

There is probably one Eurovision entry that you could all sing along to- even if you didn't realize that it was part of this prestigious competition:  Waterloo by ABBA in 1974 

Did you know that Celine Dion represented Switzerland in 1988- winning with "Ne partez pas sans moi"?

A full list of winners for the curious. (That means you, Elizabeth)

You're welcome.