Thursday, 6 October 2011

Confessions on a lack of belly shots

Before I got pregnant, I was so excited to partake in that ritual of the weekly belly shot.  I'm sure you've all seen them.  They're the standard posts to expect from a pregnant blogger these days- a weekly update of symptoms, hopes, fears, etc. accompanied by a side shot showing the development of "the bump".  I thought I'd be totally on board.

I knew going into it that I am not skinny.  That I wouldn't look like so many of the cute little bloggers out there.  But I thought I was ok with that.  I'm generally fine with my appearance and figured I'd be adding another image to the blogosphere with my belly development shots.

The weekend after we found out I was pregnant, I excitedly put on sweatpants and a white tank top (which I'd picked as my "bump shot uniform").  I asked Ross to take my picture for me.  I scrolled through the many options that he took, my face dropping.  They weren't cute.  In my frustration, I thought that the backdrop was to blame.  I made Ross retake the pictures- moving from in front of our front door to in front of our kitchen door.  (Good thinking Meg!  They are both white doors and look exactly the same...)  Ross took even more pictures.  They actually did look better... slightly.



Well they didn't make me annoyed enough to delete them, but they did have another effect.  I haven't taken a belly shot since.  I just couldn't face it.  I looked at my picture and thought of all the others I'd seen on the internet.  I already looked bigger than some of the girls at half or 3/4 term.  Yuck!  Why would I torture myself by making it a weekly process?

So I didn't.  And now I regret it.  I think I'm going to have to start some late in the game weekly pictures.  I think maybe it's the fact that I am starting to actually "show" now.  Mostly, though, it has to do with this picture that Ross took of me on our recent trip to Canada and New England.


I saw this picture, taken in front of the Anne of Green Gable's house on Prince Edward Island, and thought "Oh!  I look pregnant!  And happy.  And good."  I realized that I look the way that I look (something I knew before I was pregnant, but seem to have knocked out of my head by that first round of belly shots).  I AM pregnant and happy and good.  And there's no point denying it.

So for the rest of my pregnancy, I'm vowing to enjoy MY pregnancy.  And that includes my body and how I look.  I owe it to my future son or daughter and I owe it to myself.

5 comments:

  1. oh good god... put your pregnancy away...

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  2. Oh I love this post so much! I was too scared to take belly shots when i was pregnant with our daughter 9 years ago....I am heavy and felt ashamed but when I surprisingly found myself pregnant again in 2009 I forced myself to do it. Every month - I hated the photos, but I am so so glad I did it now :) That photo on Prince Edward Island is GORGEOUS!

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  3. I think you look adorable! And happy. :)

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  4. You look absolutely lovely and I think it's wonderful to add to the images of pregnancy available to reflect a more complete spectrum of women's experiences.

    (Unrelatedly, I find the Anne of Green Gables House sort of bizarre because she's fictional but everyone and everything there sort of seems to forget that. I understand how closely Lucy Maud Montgomery's work was tied with PEI, but it's as if they built a Little Women house and said things like "there's the very fireplace where Amy burned Jo's manuscript!")

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